Sunday, July 31, 2011

Our Little Dash

The average human lifespan is about 650 000 hours. It sounds so short when it's put into hours. I read this a few weeks back.


Some mornings as I make my way up to the Satellite Pharmacy, I sometimes see family members huddling around a body as they mourn the loss of a loved one. The black “Van Jenazah” will be parked at nearby waiting to load yet another body to send it back home. Sometimes as I walk pass by, I try to imagine what the family would be going through over the next few months. I think it’s a natural reaction as you recall the time when you yourself had loss someone and tried to move on. Then it's time to think about what I need to do as I walk into the Ward and that family becomes just a distant memory.


There are days in the ward when the blue curtain is abruptly drawn around a patient’s bed. You see the nurses pushing the emergency trolley towards the bed as the doctors rush to gather around the child who’s saturation or heart rate suddenly plunged. Orders will be thrown back and forth as attempts are made to keep the patient physically functioning. After a while, you suddenly hear the sounds of family members wailing as the staff all disperse to give family members their privacy to mourn. And you instantly know that another one has passed on. All you can do is whisper a short prayer hoping that the family will find comfort somehow and move on. After that, you go back to work. As if nothing happened a few minutes ago.


Apparently, everyday 155 000 people die. Just look at the obituaries daily and it’s a sober reminder of our mortality. Then again, those numbers remain as another set of compiled data. Just like how those patients we sometimes encounter become just another number. Until someone we love and know becomes part of that number. Then suddenly reality hits.

Yet we are all busy in our own world’s, busy- trying just make it through another day. There’s nothing wrong with that but in the midst of our business of trying to make it through the day, we often forget for whom we are doing it. Sometimes in the midst of all the stress of daily routines, we shout or snap at those who matter to us. We fight or gossip or complain over trivial matters.


The last few trips back home has been solemn reminder of how short life is with all the news of people passing on. It’s funny how the thought of death can make us re-evaluate what matters from the things that are not important after all.I was going through some of my old camp stuff when I went back recently and I found this poem from one of the FES Camps I’ve attended.


The Dash Poem

I read of a man who stood to speak
At the funeral of a friend
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
From the beginning to the end.

He noted first came the date of her birth
And spoke the following date with tears
But he said what matters most of all
Was the dash between those years.

For that dash represented all the time
That she spent alive on earth
And now only those who loved her
Know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not how much we own
The cars, the house, the cash
What matters is how we live
And how we spend that dash.

So think about it hard and long
Are there things that we could change?
For we never know how much time is left
To change and to rearrange.

Maybe we could just slow down a little
To consider what’s true and real
To try to understand
How another feels.

And maybe be less quick to anger
And appreciate more
To love the people in our lives
Like we’ve never loved before.

Maybe we could treat each other with respect
And wear a little smile
Remembering that this special dash
May only last for a while.

So when your eulogy is being read
With your life’s actions to rehash
Would you be proud of the things they say
About how you’ve spent your dash?


For those who are mourning over the loss of a family member, our prayers are with you. May you and your family find comfort in His love and the support of the loved ones around you. Losing a loved one is devastating, but we have all been left with a special gift - our memories. They are often the only things we have left after that special person is gone. Though at times they may be painful to think about, with them, our loved ones remain a part of us forever. Helen Keller said, "What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us." Take comfort in your memories, for they will indeed be a part of you forever.


As for the rest of us, maybe it’s time to take a break and think about what memories & legacy we are leaving behind for those who matter to us.


How are we investing in our God-given dash-es?